Friday, November 28, 2008

Fan Freakouts

It always amuses me that no matter what positive things I might post here, the entries that have some edge of sarcasm or negativity to them are always the ones that get comments. Sometimes months or even a year later. While a nice little "hey, this is a great video" will slide down the gullet of the average fan like ambrosia, some gentle criticism of their idols will make fans react as though I just fucked their mother with a twelve inch strap-on dildo in front of the Statue of Liberty while Japanese tourists captured the video on their cellphones, then uploaded it to YouTube.

This one, especially, amuses me. A year goes by without comment and now suddenly people are getting all offended on Brandon's behalf. Well, I like Brandon Flowers a lot, and I love the Killers' music, but really? Fuck him. He's in the public sphere, tossing out his opinion. Sometimes people are going to disagree with his opinion. I suppose if I was famous I could trust my legions of psychotic fans to run around leaving poorly written comments on people's blogs for criticizing my stupid opinions, too (and I have a lot of them).

The constant claims of me being a homophobe because of this entry still make me laugh, nine months after the last idiotic comment. Yes, the queer themed blog is being written by a homophobe, and this is obvious because I mock a rockstar for exploiting his own supposed bisexuality. I'm sure any day now enraged Katy Perry fans will come along to tell me she really is a dyke.

I'd like to think that this sort of idiocy is the result of twelve year olds with too much time on their hands, but I know that isn't true. The other day I overheard a friend of mine--a friend in her thirties--telling a younger friend which online communities to avoid, so as to stay away from people who maybe just might say something negative about the Twilight movie.

What coddled, speshul snowflakes we are, that we can't handle hearing criticism. It's not even criticism of ourselves, but of complete strangers that we've chosen to identify with! Maybe that's why people leave these comments, assuming I'll be as shattered by criticism as they are. I guess it would disappoint them to find out that every single nasty comment I get makes me laugh like a loon and share it proudly with my friends.

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